The reasons to not fall in love are many. If you are talking about it in a romantic sense, well, I don’t think it would be very wise to invest all your time and emotions and trust in another person. That isn’t very smart but it happens because society tells most women and men for that matter, that they have to get married.
The only really good reason I can give is that falling in love with someone makes you very vulnerable, and vulnerability put’s one at risk for all sorts of painful consequences and losses. Still, the majority of people want to love and seek it out.
Perhaps people are just masochists or gluttons for punishment, but the desire for love, to love and be loved, is extremely powerful, so they try to get it despite the risks.
Here, are some reasons why you should not fall in love.
1. Don’t fall in love in a relationship that started with lust
This is the kind of love story that has graced both the big screen and the small screen many, many times and it had fooled a great many of us into thinking that we, too, could fall in love with a one-night stand. But it’s different here in the real world. Just because you lost your heart when you stumbled back to their place that night, that does not mean they did too. They probably know the difference between a physical and an emotional connection and it’s about time you learn a thing or two on the matter too. Or you’ll end up alone and heartbroken or maybe miserable.
2. Don’t fall in love when there is a deadline
A deadline can destroy your mind completely. Also, it can affect your health. A relationship is not successful when you are facing a problem and your partner gives you a deadline to resolve your issue. Considering the priority of your partner is quite important as maintaining everything.
3. Don’t fall in love when there are 20 million miles between the two of you
Long-distance relationships take a lot of effort and it puts you through a lot of emotional struggle. One of those days, you will wonder if any of this is worth it. When you start wondering this, you won’t be able to help thinking of the other party is wondering the same thing.
4. Don’t fall in love with long, wonderful conversations
We get it, nobody can have the kind of connection you have. It transcends normal human interaction and stretches deep into your soul. It’s the special, out-of-this-world, it’s exceptional. Here’s a news flash for you: that’s what everyone in love thinks. Falling in love on such a deep and personal level is the best feeling in the world, but this also invites the worst kind of heartbreak, loneliness, misery.
5. Don’t fall in love “despite what they say”
Now, people will always have a lot of stupid reasons why you should not be with the person you love. Maybe it’s the difference in background. Maybe it’s the difference in attractiveness. Maybe it’s the difference in capabilities. These people are ridiculous and you should ignore them but when all your family and friends start disapproving, there is something wrong. They are always going to be looking out for you. If every single one of them has expressed some form of disapproval, then you either need to reassess the kinds of friends you have made or drop your lover fast, before they do it and leave you alone, heartbroken and miserable.
To avoid falling in love, I abide by the following things.
- In the night, through self-talk therapy, I try equating the negative impacts of togetherness with the positive impacts of being with them. (The Psychology of Continuous Affirmation)
- I create an aura of negativity around that person which kills even the slightest attraction within 2–3 days. (The Unethical Hack)
- Meanwhile, I put an end to all forms of contact.
- It, therefore, becomes easy to let go of the feelings and therefore doesn’t leave scope for emotional attachment.
- In a week or so, the negativity too disperses amidst the other positive things in life and closes the chapter of both hard feelings and attraction.
- But, I lose a potential “future companion” in this process, every time I do this. (Disadvantage)
- Having said that, I also save myself from a potential rejection or heartbreak. (Advantage)
You must think about these questions before you fall in love
1. What kind of person am I?
Am I an introvert or an extrovert? What character am I? What hobbies do I have? Do you like lively or quiet? What do I feel happy about? What makes me feel sad? You have to know yourself first. Otherwise, it’s like going out to buy clothes without knowing your figure. It’s very likely that after you buy them back, you may feel that they don’t fit in with you. If you leave them, you won’t wear them. If you throw them away, you will feel pity.
2. Why should I fall in love?
When shopping, I always feel lonely when I see couples when others are sad, they have a warm embrace, two people live together can save money and so on. That’s why a person wants to fall in love. But if love is only to solve their problems in some aspects, they will eventually find that it will only bring more problems. Love should not be a solution to a problem, but rather meet a person who is more suitable to me. We can attract and appreciate each other, accompany each other, and experience many unknown things in life together.
3. Do I want to fall in love or just play?
You should be clear about the purpose of love. Are you determined to develop a relationship? Ask yourself whether you are serious, or just want to find someone to accompany you and enrich your emotional experience?
4. What is my bottom line in love?
You can make a list of the things you can’t accept. Cheating is probably the most people are difficult to accept, so once the other party appears in this situation, it should be timely termination of love. At the same time, we should also consider whether the bottom line is reasonable. I have seen a couple break up because of different nationalities.
5. What can I offer in love?
Any relationship, in addition to attracting each other, needs the efforts of both sides to establish and maintain it. One may need company, understanding, support, praise, money. Only when the two sides pay more equally can the relationship be stable. Love and business are the same, the price and value of the same, a business can belong. Would you like to do a business at a loss?
6. Can I accept the other person’s different views?
In the world, there are no two people who agree with the concept of personality habits, which has nothing to do with love or not. Two people need to seek the maximization of “common interests” gradually in the process of getting along. Many lovers at a certain time feel completely unable to get along with and break up, separated for a period to realize that the original “cannot stand” is a very small thing. It’s almost impossible to find another person who fits you perfectly. When two people are in the same direction, they need to make some adjustments or concessions.
Lastly, nobody can avoid falling in love. It’s not in your control. If somebody can avoid falling in love that means he is not in love. Love doesn’t look for money, color, beauty, caste color, nationality. It is a natural process that cannot be stopped. It happens in few seconds to years. Most of the time it’s one way. Only a few lucky ones get their feelings reciprocated. If your real man it’s natural to fall in love. Girls like a man who accepts their decision. Support her to get a good partner so that at least she is happy. God had programmed men to have a soft corner for females and attract them by power. Females are programmed to show their beauty to attract the best out of guys and reproduce.
Once the process is completed men again start hunting for the next girl. Men think they have succeeded in winning the girl’s heart but it’s always the reverse.